Song IX

Should I ever find peace
And with the Universe
I am One
I’d still be alone, without you

What has been ended
In my mind, put at rest
Cannot escape the blood
Echoing through my heart

How can I be so foolish
Wishing to ignore the barriers
The walls too slippery to climb
Cliffs too treacherous to tread
Still, I map out destinations
That intertwine with your travels
I analyze
I poke; I prod
I try to make it fit

But something is missing
In all of this
And I wonder if you think of these
What might and could have been
I wonder if there is a chance
To kiss your lips again

Then we talk and talk and talk of things
That matter so little to us
And, yet, when you need
I will call
To talk and talk and talk

Why is your life so hard
So lonely; so dead
I comfort you with piece of mind
That I really wish I had
Do you know how I feel
You know how I am
But then you may not realize
The depth of the emptiness inside

And maybe these are rantings
Words written in despair
I should learn to accept what little time was ours
And take it as that
But still, I am alone with that peace
And I still love you

1997 © Jonathan Russell